Marriage Corner
Steve & Kalie Lanier
Steven and Kalie met, fell in love, and have been doing life together with their children for almost 2yrs now. They decided from the beginning that prayer would be the cornerstone of their marriage and communication the glue that held everything together. “Being supportive of each other goals and dreams by speaking positive affirmations is one of the major nuggets that keep our romance alive.” Steve & Kalie have made appoint to continue this journey with their children and full time jobs. While sometimes marriage can be a challenge, this is how they are making their marriage last forever!
Golden Nuggets
1. Always pray for one another and together.
2. Real talk. Communication is key. We made a deal that at least once a week, just him and I, will sit down and talk about everything.
3. Always be supportive of each other even when it's hard too. Supporting each other's hopes, goals, and dreams!
4. Making time for one another. This is probably our biggest struggle with both of us having full time jobs and four kiddos, one of which being a newborn. Again this is when that one a day a week comes into play!
5. Positive affirmations. Building each other up and being each other's biggest cheerleader and supporter!
6. Keeping the romance alive. This should probably be the second on the list but somehow came in last. Romance in my opinion, is one of the biggest parts of our marriage.
Golden Nuggets
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We keep God at the center of our marriage. You can’t dishonor your spouse by honoring God; they go hand in hand.
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We have learned to watch how we communicate. We stay respectful and choose to speak positively over each other.
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We prioritize intimacy. Understanding each other’s need for intimacy allows us to find balance and routine for keeping this area healthy in our marriage.
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We make time to have fun together. Even if it’s simple like playing cards or just being silly while talking and eating ice cream.
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We forgive one another. It can be easy to hang on to something that really hurt, but we have learned to be quick about letting it go instead of dwelling on it.
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We choose to get uncomfortable. Things like owning up to a wrong, confessing sin and confronting it, or even serving your spouse aren’t natural.
Caleb & Christine
Flores
Caleb and Christine Flores have been married for almost 2.5 years and have a baby boy who is almost 1. They met through a mutual friend who played in a worship band with Christine and played in another band with Caleb. “We’ve learned a few lessons along the way like: How quality time fuels our love for each other. Being quick to say “I’m sorry” and moving on is a win-win. Tough conversations are hard, but communication and forgiveness is the key ( a kind tone makes all the difference), and we know we must step outside our comfort zones to grow. I can truly say we are continuing to learn that there are several things that make a marriage so rewarding!”
Jason & Trek Powell
Meet Jason and Trek Powell. They were married on 07/02/2016 and will be celebrating 4 years of marriage this year. They have a handsome little boy who is almost 20 months old. “The first time we set eyes on one another was at a conference that was held in Las Vegas. After the conference, we didn’t see each other for almost 6 months after that first encounter.” Jason lived in Virginia and Trek lived in Texas so you can imagine how creative and more intentional they had to be with a long distance relationship. “Once we were married and under one roof, there was so much more we realized we had to learn about one another. We had differences, but the key to overcoming those differences are to have the right attitude and sow the right seeds to resolve it. Those seeds for us are communication, patience and understanding and we are still learning. However, communication is is the number 1 key. We have learned that words matter and can damage a marriage if not respectfully done. After all, a perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other!”
Golden Nuggets
1. When going through tough times, we learned to trust in God more. He will help you develop peace, patience and joy regardless of the circumstance.
2. Pray for your spouse even when you don’t feel like it. Those prayers can change the dynamic of your marriage when you least expect it.
3. Continue to date your spouse - keep your marriage as exciting as it was when you were dating.
4. No matter how upset we get with one another, we vow to always kiss goodnight.
5. Hold each other accountable to help you grow as the couple God intended you to be.
6. Whenever we get into an argument never play the blame game. Accept when you are wrong and apologize!
Golden Nuggets
1. Prayer- it is the corner stone of our marriage.
2. Constant Communication- sometimes meaning can get lost, so it’s so important to always be on the same page.
3. Accountability- produces honesty
4. Consistency- produces faithfulness
5. Valuable Time - we consider the time we spend together to be the most valuable time we have.
6. Romance & Intimacy - it’s so important to make sure you have purpose in your romance and intimacy, it will change the whole dynamics of your marriage.
Eric & Morenike Shelton
Eric and Morenike have been married for 9 yrs and together for a total of 11 yrs. They met at church as both were involved in youth ministry. After countless times of running into each other and Eric “smoothly” suggesting they stay in contact, he finally asked for her number “without asking for her number.” 😉😉They have been rolling together ever since, making it 11 years of dating and 9 years of marriage in July 2020. They have 1 daughter Ms. Willow-Symone, who is the light of their lives, so if you want to know how they make it work...
Manuel & Cassandra Jones
Manuel and Cassandra recently celebrated 25 years of marriage. These two met doing ministry together and they believe over time while thing were not perfect, "God restored a broken marriage and revealed His glory within it and we never forgot how we got here or where He has brought us from. We enjoy marriage. We enjoy spending time with each other. We trust each other and can turn to each other when we feel beat up by the world around us. Our home is a haven and we can run to it for comfort just as we can run into the arms of the Lord as a strong tower. This is the marriage that God intended for us."
Golden Nuggets
1. Remember that above all, your spouse is your brother or sister in Christ and deserves the respect as such.
2. Your spouse has relationships outside of you and should be allowed to spend time with others and enjoy those relationships.
3. You must be on one accord regarding the finances. No matter why may be the greater contributor at any given point.
4. Invest in your marriage...date night and vacations are particularly important.
5. Learn to accept the differences in each other. This will be a continuous process.
6. Your individual relationships with the Lord are of the utmost importance. This allows us to sow into one another and build each other up as needed.
Sam & Cheryl Avery
Sam and Cheryl Avery have been married for 9.5 years and have known one another for a total of 20+ years. They met in Birmingham Alabama where he was performing. Here's a few words they have to share, "Later in our relationship, he told me a few days prior about a dream he had about meeting a dark skinned woman and when he saw me he knew I was that woman!" The have been doing music and loving and laughing together ever since!
Golden Nuggets
1. We talk about everything and don't have to try.
2. We laugh ALL THE TIME!
3. We are best friends, we don't just love each other but we like each other.
4. We understand when the other person needs space.
5. We let each other cry. We don't downplay each other's emotions.
6. We accept each other's flaws.
Eli & Sherri Daniel
Eli and Sherri met in 1982 at church. Here’s what they have to say about how their relationship began: “We met at the age of 13 and 8. We had homecoming revivals back then and they church was on and ours. And my sister went wit his cousin. They was behind the church kissing and I caught them. Was gonna go tell my mama when she stopped me and told me wait it a boy wanna talk to you too. And it was Eli. They told him to talk to me so I wouldn’t go tell on her. Well he kissed me and after that I told the world he was gonna be my husband. Who knew I was Prophesying then. Lol. Well we have been together for a total of 29 years coming this August. But we have been married coming July 30 for 25 years. It started at the church and guess there is where it will end. Who knew God was gonna use us!!!!!”
Golden Nuggets
1. Always pray together. Keep God because without Him it won’t work.
2. Keep the line of communication constantly flowing.
3. Keep the sex life spiced up and spontaneous as much as you can.
4. Never argue over money.
5. Don’t take each other for granted-it stops you from seeing the greatness in each other.
6 Last but should have been at the top. KEEP FAMILY FRIENDS BUT MOSTLY IN LAWS OUT OF YOUR RELATIONSHIP.
Golden Nuggets
1. Keep God first and seek him before making any decision.
2. Pray together
3. Never go to bed mad.
4. Keep people out of your business/relationship
5. Schedule date nights as often as possible
6. Communicate about everything!
Joey & Gretta Harris
Joey and Gretta Harris met at the University of West Georgia. “We both attended school there and had mutual friends.” Through their mutual friends, they ended up meeting at a birthday gathering. “Joey was looking for a church home, and I invited him to attend my church. We began having several conversations about God and developed a close friendship. As we grew closer to God, we realized that God ordained for us to be together.” Joey and Gretta have been married 6 yrs, they tied the knot in June of 2014. With God as their foundation, their love story is one of maturity, growth, and unconditional love for one another. “He’s my best friend and I am his.” So stay tuned this week for the 6 Golden Nuggets on how they are making their marriage last forever.
RJ & Valerie Tolentino
Meet Rj & Valerie Tolentino. They’ve been holding strong for 11 years. They met through their love for cars and racing. “I played a damsel in distress by needing my front plate put back together after a small fender bender with a sliding gate. I reached out to him for his mechanical abilities (knowing I could have fully tackled the problem myself).” They worked together at the time and slowly hit it off and continued dating. Now we are married, 2 beautiful kids, and still continue to pray as ask God to refine us daily.
Golden Nuggets
1. Communication is definitely key.
2. Daily routines- we’ve learned that through our struggles our love has been made stronger for each other.
3.We send each other off for work with a kiss and I love you.
4. We great each other home with the same routine.
5. We make sure to carve out monthly dates.
6.We pray over each other. It isn't an easy journey.
Golden Nuggets
1. When you have a relationship with God, He'll teach you to love yourself (not in a vain way) then you will be able to love others (as yourself)
2. Let your spouse be who God has called him/her to be. Give him/her room to be themselves
3. Never let the sun go down on your wrath. Even if you don't fully agree; agree to disagree
4. TALK
5. Listen with your heart and not with your ears.
6. Be spontaneous! Learn your spouse's love language... AND GO FOR IT!!!
Martin & Gloria Martell
Meet Martin & Gloria Martell who have been married for a little over 29 years.
“When we met in 1989,” Gloria was a single mom from an abusive relationship but in the mist of it all, somehow we became friends and then our relationship grew and before you knew it, were married in 1991. In 1993 or son was born; but we never used the phrase "stepfather or stepdaughter-“ EVER!!!!! We have had our ups and downs but we have always been committed to our love, staying together and raising our children and grandchildren.
Carlos & Valencia Coverson
Meet the Coverson's, they met in April of 2007, a week before Easter Sunday. They both were going through divorces from previous marriages and after a few dates, they lost contact with each other and went their separate ways. “Then in 2010, I found her on Facebook destined to finish what I started, but she was apprehensive at first so I had to chase her down!” In 2011, they officially became a couple and have been together ever since. “We officially tied the knot in July of 2013 after relocating from Georgia to Maryland. We've had good and bad moments but the good far outweighs the bad by far. Marriage will always be a challenge but it can also be rewarding and beneficial for both. In 7yrs, they have learned so much, grown and became “better person with Valencia by my side and looking forward to the future.”
Golden Nuggets
1. You have to be willing to grow and get out of your comfort zone.
2. Never give up. Sometimes life deals you a bad hand but if you don’t fold, you will WIN!
3. Be determined...we knew what we wanted and we went after it!
4. Love unconditionally.
5. Don’t look back- your past should never dictate your future!
6. We definitely keep God first. He blessed us with each other at the right time and we do not take that for granted!
Duane & Felecia Lee
Golden Nuggets
1. Keep communication clear and constant. (Open and honest)
2. Laughter and constant fun.
(We are silly and crazy together, we cut up like the best friends we are.)
3. Worship God together
4. Treat each other with much respect, because it never gets old.
5. Never argue or yell at each other.(Period!This is never ok!) ALWAYS KEEP PEACE!
6. Pray together
(Every opportunity you get, that's key.)
They have been married 5-1/2 years and together for a total of 6 years. They have been friends since middle school. “Fatcat and I met in middle school, we also went to high school together and Fatcat was one grade older than me. We knew each other but weren't close friends in either middle or high school. We saw each other at a high school alumni event about 20 years later and many other alumni events after that. He would always end up being my dance partner at these events. I was divorced but dating all the times I would see him. We were pretty cool friends but still just friends.” A couple of years later, they both attended a birthday party for a mutual and close friend of Fee’s. They took pictures and had a ball as they normally did, but this time when he asked “where's your man,” Fee was finally able to reply “I don't have one so you can stop asking!” Believe it or not Fatcat was actually there that night to try and possibly “ask out” another friend of theirs (whose party they were attending by the way) but that went down the drain after finding out Fee didn’t have a man and since that night they have been together! “I truly believe that because our relationship started later in life it taught us to value each other and know how to be happy and treat each other with respect and love.” Fatcat proposed 4 months into their relationship and they were married 2 months later. This was one of the best decisions they ever made.
Golden Nuggets
1. The most important part is having Christ in our marriage. We did loose focus during the early years but we learned how to regain our focus after learning some hard lessons.
2. Our second nugget would be communication some thing that we had to learn is how to communicate listen and hear what we were saying to each other.
3. The third nugget would be compromised.We need to learn how to compromise our own wants and look at each other for what we needed.
4. The fourth nugget is commitment.
5. The fifth nugget is compassion for one another. Learning each other‘s love language was key to doing that.
6. The sixth nugget is friendship. Randy has always and will always be my best friend.
Understanding marriage takes time and even after that it takes more time. Be patient with yourself and with your mate and over time you will learn what works and what doesn’t.
Randy & Debbie Melton
Randy and Debbie Melton have been married for 30 years. Yes 30 YEARS!!! “Married on June 16, 1990, these 30 years have taught Randy and I a lot of lessons and several seasons of life together.” The Melton’s could fill a book on these lessons but most importantly are the ones that hold their marriage and their family together. Check out how they make their marriage last forever.
Stephen and Aimitria Nuttall
Stephen and Aimitria Nuttall have been married for 15 years. They met in 1994 at a mutual friends baby shower (not really taking notice of one another, they went their separate ways) but then reconnected in 2000 through the same mutual friend and decided to give it a shot and go out. “We discovered we both were rebels, and the rest is history. All in all we have been together for a total of 20 years and FAMILY means everything to us. We have 2 beautiful daughters-Trinity, 19 and Sura who is 13 years old. We continue to make our family and marriage work in ways that are best for us.” Read their 6 Golden Nuggets to see how they make their marriage last forever!
Golden Nuggets
1. Communication- you MUST communicate even when you don’t want to!
2. Individuality - Be able to separate WE from ME. Don’t lose yourself in your spouse.
3. Date Nights- Keep dating and getting to know more about the person you are married to...make it fun)
4. Don’t take everything so serious- Whatever the issue, it is probably NOT that serious.
5. Accountability- your partner needs their own friends that they can spend time with and be themselves. They will need more than just you holding them accountable to who they are.
6. Always, Always allow yourselves to Laugh - Enjoy each other, because in the end, that is your spouse and they are all you have.
Golden Nuggets
1. Keeping God first- we understand that nothing happens without his say so.
2. A lot of prayer- a family that prays together stays together.
3. Open communication- we always try to keep the lines of communication open no matter what.
4. Giving each other space- we give each other the space needed to grow individually so that we can grow together.
5. Focusing on our shared responsibility, i.e. kids, bills, etc.
6. Making the decision daily to stay together- it is a decision and we work to make this happen everyday.
Allen & Afrah Davis
Allen and Afrah met at a restaurant she worked at right after graduating from high school. He was a police officer and she was a waitress/hostess. “He ate at the restaurant every morning and I worked the morning shift.” He finally worked up the nerve to ask her out and from their they dated briefly. “Over the next several years we were off and on , but the timing never seemed right so we went our separate ways. Finally (10 years later) we reunited and have never been apart since and we now have 3 beautiful children. Do we have our ups and downs, yes, but it is clear we were/are meant for each other. God had a plan. We have been married for 10 years and counting.” They work hard everyday at making their marriage last forever, read the 6 Golden Nuggets to how they do it: